JOKE TELLERS ARE POPULAR
“Learn how telling jokes will cause people to like you and help to give you a reputation as the smartest person in the room”.
By: John D. Gaskell, author of:
You are what you are perceived to be. Let me show you how to become a MARKETING genius.
SAMPLE JOKES (Part 18 of a multi-part article)
Why do you want to tell jokes?
When someone tells a funny joke with great delivery, it makes people laugh and feel happy. It also helps them to like the person telling the joke, remember that person, and causes them think that you, as the joke teller, are smart. This enhances your reputation as “the smartest person in the room.”
- Talking Dog
A guy was walking down the street and saw a dog on someone’s front lawn. Next to the dog is a sign: Talking Dog for Sale. He looks at the sign and then at the dog and says: “I don’t believe it.” The dog speaks-up and says: “It’s true. I have been able to speak since I was just a pup. As a matter of fact, I have had a great career as a spy. They ship me off to conferences. I sit in the corner like I am taking a nap, but I remember everything and come back and tell my handlers.
The guy said: “That’s fantastic. Why are they selling you?” The dog says: “I don’t know.” The guy goes up to the door. When someone comes he asks: “How much do you want for the dog?” The homeowner replies: “You can have him for $20.” The man asks: “Why only $20 for a talking dog?” The homeowner replied: “That dog is a liar. He has never been out of the front yard.”
Near my home in Florida there is a little Italian restaurant that I had been going to once a week; not because of the food, but because of the pretty blond waitress. When I told her this joke, she stopped me when I got to the spot where I said: “The dog spoke up.” She asked: “Is this a true story?” You know, I haven’t been back to that restaurant since.
- Woman wakes-up from operation
A woman was in the hospital waking up from an operation when she has an epiphany and sees god. She asks: “Did I die?” God said: “No; you have another 30 years left.” So, after the woman was fully awake she thought. If I have another 30 years, maybe I should have a little work done while I am here in the hospital. So, she had a face-lift, a tummy-tuck and a boob-job. “The Works”. When she was leaving the hospital, she was hit by a bus and ended up in heaven.
She said to God: “What happened?” God shrugged and said: “I didn’t recognize you”.
- $70 bucks is $70 bucks
A couple went to a country fair, where they were offering helicopter rides for 70 dollars. The guy said to his wife: “I have always wanted to go up in a helicopter.” The wife replied: “$70 bucks is $70 bucks”.
The next year they go back to the same fair, and the guy said to his wife: “I am 75 this year. I may not get another chance to go up in a helicopter.” She replied: “$70 bucks is $70 bucks”.
The pilot overheard the conversation and said: I’ll make a deal with you. You both go up with me and if neither of you says a word, it’s free. If either of you speaks up, it’s $70 bucks.”
So, they went up. The piolet does some “loop-de-loops” and there’s silence. When they land, the pilot says: “I can’t believe that nobody said anything.” The guy said: “I almost spoke up when my wife fell out, but $70 bucks is $70 bucks.”
If you truly want to be perceived as “The smartest person in the room”, get Jack’s new book: How to become the “SMARTEST PERSON” in the Room, and learn the details. You are what you are perceived to be. Let me show you how to become s MARKETING genius. Visit: TheEngineersResource.com to find out more.
Excerpted from How to become the “SMARTEST PERSON” in the Room. © 2018 John D. Gaskell. Used with permission of Professional Value Books, Inc. All rights reserved. Order at TheEngineersResource.com. Use coupon code “room” and save.
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